Kelona Hamilton
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Kelona Hamilton

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Development & Communications Director

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A Ramadhan to Remember: Establishing Family Traditions for the Blessed Month

SISTERS Magazine | July 2012

Creative Motivations’ Ke’lona Hamilton discusses the importance of family traditions and gives us a few suggestions for creating Ramadhan traditions of our own.

The wonderful month of Ramadhan is now approaching. For children and adults alike, this can be a much-needed time to grow spiritually and become closer as a family. For individuals who have been raised Muslim, many family traditions may be passed on and practiced year after year. However, for converts, or individuals who are just beginning to practice their faith, this can mean developing a whole new set of traditions as well as the abandonment of many of the celebrations (such as birthdays, Christmas, etc) that we may have grown up with.

Growing up as a non-Muslim, I had fond memories of the holidays. We were not a religious family and we were not a wealthy family, so we would often focus upon family togetherness, gratitude, and love during these special times. Whether it was decorating with handmade trinkets, the taste of my grandmother’s turkey dressing or the fresh scent of pine needles, these memories still warm my heart –even today.

So when I converted to Islam and began to have children of my own, I knew that many of the traditions that I had so loved as a child would not be carried on. As the years passed, a few Ramadhans and Eids went by but something was clearly missing. I realized that it was time to create new family traditions so that my children could have the same heart-warming memories that I cherished from my own childhood.

For families living in non-Muslim lands, it can especially be difficult to compensate for the countless non-Islamic holidays practiced around us. Making Ramadhan and the two Eids special, and filling them with traditions that the family can look forward to, can really help fill-in the gaps and ensure that children do not feel discouraged by the non-Muslim festivities around them. So here are a few traditions and ideas from our family to yours. I hope they will inspire you to find creative ways to make your next Ramadhan one to remember.

Ramadhan traditions to:

Get into the spirit

  • Begin fasting in the month before Ramadhan. Try to include the whole family. This willmake transitioning into full-time fasting much easier.
  • Create a Ramadhan Countdown Calendar to heighten the excitement and help everyoneprepare for the fast.
  • Before Ramadhan begins, discuss each family member’s goals for the month andexplore ways to help one another achieve those goals.
  • Decrease TV time and create a special Ramadhan Reading Space. Decorate the area withfloor pillows and a small bookshelf and put lots of age-appropriate Islamic books on theshelf that will appeal to everyone in the household.
  • Ramadhan is a time of renewal. Clean the whole house and have the children gothrough clothes, toys and books and set aside items that they don’t want or useanymore. Have a garage sale and donate the funds to charity or donate the items to alocal charitable organisation.
  • Decorate the house as a family. Something as simple as paper rings, stars and lanternscan really spruce up the home and offers an excellent opportunity to bond with thefamily. You can also decorate the outside of the house to show that this is your family’stime to celebrate. Try having the kids decorate a sign to hang on your door announcingthat it’s the Holy Month.

Strengthen the bonds

  • Have younger children fast from candy/sweets so that they feel included, too!
  • Get together as a family when Ramadhan is expected to begin and attempt to site the moon.
  • Make suhoor extra special by serving smoothies or pastries that are normally reserved as treats.
  • Make a Ramadhan scrap book (online as a photo album/blog or a real one with arts and crafts supplies) taking photos of the moon each night, gifts and meals shared, fun activities, etc.
  • Spend some time outdoors, even if it’s only your own backyard. Use this opportunity to talk to the kids about the moon cycles, or just relish in the beauty of nature.
  • The family that prays together stays together! Go to masjid as a family to pray the Night Prayer, and occasionally pray it at home as family as well.

Strengthen the faith

  • Make a “Gratitude Jar.” Decorate a jar, then think of 30 things you or your family maybe grateful for. Write these ideas on scraps of paper and add an activity to each one that celebrates that gratitude. Pull one gratitude/activity from the jar each day and talkabout why you’re grateful for it and do the activity together.
  • In addition to Qur’an, play permissible nasheeds around the house to keep everyone distracted from the difficulty of the fast.
  • Have the children work as a team to memorize a new surah of the Qur’an. Reward them if they are able to complete it.
  • If you don’t do this regularly, have the children (and yourself) recite the 3 Quls and make dua each night before bed.

Increase in charity

  • Allow each child to decorate their own Sadaqah jar and then give them opportunities to earn money throughout the month to fill it. Reward the child who earns the most with a special badge or the choice of where you’ll eat for Eid breakfast.
  • To pay Zakat-ul-Fitr, have the kids help put together a food box, then leave it anonymously on the door-step of a needy family early before the Eid prayer.
  • Volunteer at a local organisation as a family. Seeing others in need and joining together as a family to help your community reinforces the ideas that are central to the month of Ramadhan.
  • Buy to-go trays and have your children help you make food plates. Check with yourmasjid for free dawah pamphlets and tape pamphlets on top of the trays and pass them out to local homeless people.

Share the love

  • Have the kids help bake cookies, put them in decorative bags and give them to neighbours with an explanation of the month of Ramadhan and the importance of kindness to one’s neighbours in Islam.
  • Invite family and friends over for iftar and prepare the meal as a family. There is tremendous reward in feeding the fasting person when it’s time to break their fast. This also helps extend your Ramadhan traditions and festivities to the whole community.
  • Can’t get to see all of your extended family? Make a video blog! Make a short recording each day of Ramadhan, talking about the difficulty or ease of the fast, family activities,childhood memories, reflections on the prayer or Qur’an you’ve read that day. Post the video clips on a Blog and invite your family members to subscribe or post videos of their own.

These are just a few family traditions to consider for the coming Ramadhans. Find traditions that work well for your family and try them this year. Before you know it, they will become long-standing traditions in your home that will make every Ramadhan, a Ramadhan to remember, insha Allah!

As published in SISTERS MAGAZINE, July 2012 Issue.